


Beyond Compare, Part 2 - Settling The Matter

by badskippy



Series: Bagginshield One-Offs [35]
Category: The Hobbit (Jackson Movies), The Hobbit - All Media Types, The Hobbit - J. R. R. Tolkien
Genre: Declarations Of Love, Drunken Shenanigans, Idiots in Love, Love, Love Confessions, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-23
Updated: 2018-08-23
Packaged: 2019-07-01 08:02:55
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 424
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15769953
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/badskippy/pseuds/badskippy





	Beyond Compare, Part 2 - Settling The Matter

* * *

 

 _Is there no way to end this?_ Bilbo shook his head, lost as to what to do!

“THAT’S ENOUGH!” Thorin bellowed, trying to choke Dwalin into silence.

“HAH!” Dwalin said, attempting to pull Thorin’s braids right off his head.  “YOU CAN’T STAND THE TRUTH!”

“WHAT TRUTH?!”

“THAT ORI’S MORE BEAUTIFUL THAN LADY YAVANNA HERSELF!”

“TAKE THAT BACK!”  Thorin was shocked that Dwalin would dare compare Ori to Lord Mahal’s wife!   But then, Bilbo was better than _all_ the Valar combined!  “BILBO IS THE PRETTIEST OF THEM ALL!”

“NOT AT ALL!” Dwalin spat.  “ORI IS THE ONE TO HOLD THAT TITLE!”

The hall was a riot of laughter and cheers.  Many had chosen a side, some with Dwalin, some with Thorin, but all were just egging the pair on.  Soon, every Dwarf was banging their tankard on a table and cheering.  

Why, even The Company were amused and bets were being exchanged between the friends over who was right, who was wrong, and who would win in the end!

Of course, not everyone was enjoying the argument.

Balin sighed and rolled his eyes; he had lost count of how many drunken arguments his brother and Thorin had had over the years about this, that, or another thing.  When were these two going to grow up?  He was getting too old for this.

Dori sat, red-faced and lips pursed; to have his baby brother the subject of such a spectacle was completely unacceptable.  Displeased didn’t come close to his feelings.  There had better be a proposal by the week’s end, or Dwalin wouldn’t live to see next week’s beginning!

But the subjects of the argument were even more unamused.

“I had no idea this morning,” Bilbo said, face-palming, and huddled in the corner with Ori; far too sober to deal with Thorin and Dwalin, “that by this evening I’d be thinking of suicide!  Kill me, please …”  

Ori held up a hand, hiding his glowing, red face.  “I have a far less drastic idea.” He chanced one quick look at the warring king and guard.  “Let’s get out of here!”

Bilbo nodded.  He and Ori made their way to a side door, ready to sneak away; no one was watching them.  But before they left, they noticed that the hall was starting to empty; everyone was following Thorin and Dwalin to the sparring pitch as Dwalin had challenged Thorin to a duel to settle the matter, and Thorin had _naturally_ accepted!

“Oh … my … lord!” Ori declared, breathlessly.  “This can _not_ be good!”

Bilbo fearfully had to agree.

 

 

 


End file.
